Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Blow Pops vs Tootsie Roll Pops

There are a few established stereotypes you will know just by reading this blog:

Hard Candy= for old people, pedophiles
Necco wafers= for the mentally ill
Red flavored candy= for people who are conventional (and right)

to add a new one to the list,

Lollipops= for rappers

As with everything else, rappers cannot agree on shit! I might write a few paragraphs defending my choice but to dedicate hours in a studio and spend millions in production to rep your lollipop of choice is fucking hardcore.

like most actual rap battles, these two are owned by the same company...


1. Blowpops


Blowpops were invented in the 1970s by a dude by the name of Vincent Ciccone. He was known as Mr. Ciccone by the world and Vinny by his friends in the family. Mr. Ciccone was a made man who did not take shit from anyone, anyone who disrespected any of his blowpops (especially the strawberry ones which suck out loud) would find themselves in a deep sleep at the bottom of the ocean. Because of the controversy regarding the Strawberry Massacre, Ciccone decided to sell his blowpops to the Tootsie Roll Industries in 1988.

I personally prefer Blowpops and my favorite flavor of them all is Green Apple.

Disclaimer: If you are going on a date, to a party or on a job interview. DO NOT EAT A GREEN APPLE BLOWPOP BEFOREHAND! your tongue will look like you just had a sloppy makeout session with the grinch.

"I know I was a tease tonight, but i will fuck you on Christmas. Promise"



As for as the rap angle, the recently incarcerated Lil Wayne is on the blow pop side of things.


Reppin' Blow Pops



2. Tootsie Roll Pops-


Tootsie Roll Pops are the OG of the lollipop business and were created in 1930 by Brandon Perry (screw you for not having a stereotypical last name). The company changed it's name to Tootsie Roll Industries in 1966 and the rest is candy history. Tootsie Roll Industries is the real winner of this battle because as previously stated, they own both blowpops and tootsie roll pops.

I couldn't find any information on the sales of blowpops but twenty million Tootsie Roll Pops are produced every single day so they probably sell better.

And before you ask according to student researchers at Cambridge University it takes 3481 licks to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop.

so with that great setup I give you Lil Wayne and Blowpop's challenger, Lil Kim.


Reppin' Tootsie Roll Pops






Winners= Blow Pops, Lil Wayne and Mr. Ciccone